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How To Be Happy.... - Pdf Download - CiteHR

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chandrasekhar_7203
3

:D :lol: :lol:

Dear Avalok,

I am very happy & impressed to see you pondering over my ideas burning midnight oil.

On most of the matters, because of your inclination to be a “funny man”, you got me wrong, but you are on the job to understand. You need to understand me more to get me right. Firstly I would like to admit that I am not enemy of Spirituality and Gurus. I don’t deny the importance of Spirituality in our lives, nor I have any scant respect for Gurus and their advice. I am like a Cat on the wall….I look both sides as to which is the better place to jump…the Spiritual plane or the Material plane….I often feel the middle path is always good. That means sometimes jump this side, sometimes jump that side.

I will come statement by statement….in what you assembled from my thoughts.

“We should be happy to be unhappy”

Did you see Wimbledon championships recently? There you will find the Star players like Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal, Serena Williams and Maria Sharapova appear to us getting unhappy, angry with themselves when they can’t play the shot properly. In the game of life too man has a natural inclination to perform and perfect his life and work. When they don’t live up to the expectation, they get frustrated, angry and unhappy with their performance.

But that is all momentary. Let us say, during the final match, Rafeal Nadal could not live up to his expectations. He gets angry with himself, unhappy with himself during the course of the match. After the match is over, he comes back to normalcy from his emotional hype, because he knows there is no use committing suicide because he lost the final.

He gathers his temperament, calmness and give positive feedback to himself…like…”what if I have lost the match…I am only 21 years old….I am like a rising Sun, Federer is going to become part of history books very soon…..anyway I have come up to the finals and performed better than last Wimbledon final….there is a lot of future for me….”.

In all great people unhappiness will be there. But they don’t allow it occupy their minds so much that it takes away their joy and peace of mind. Where it is necessary they will allow unhappiness to crop up and use that to improve their performance. I am not saying we should fill our organizations with unhappy, dissatisfied souls who always appear to us frustrated with their lives.

Your second statement :

“We can be creative only when we are unhappy….”.

I did not say like that, nor I agree with this view. You got me wrong. Even happiness can inspire creativity. When we are in a joyous mood, our emotional intelligence works and we crack very intelligent jokes that fill the audience with laughter. Did you notice? At the same time, unhappiness also leads to creativity, that is why wise people earlier said, “necessity is the mother of invention”.

Your third statement :

“Selfish behavior is good”

There also you got me wrong. As long as our selfishness does not defeat the purpose of the organization and does not cause inconvenience to others, it is OK to be selfish. Selfishness is OK as long as it does not lead one to indulge in illegal behavior.

I had a friend in my past organization who used work very hard to impress the boss. He used to come to office punctually. He used to take on all the load of boss’s work on his head, and very soon he became the dearest subordinate of the boss. That used to affect his peers and subordinates and they used to murmer behind him about his sycophancy to the boss. They used to sit and gather away from him and he understood that they don’t like his presence when they are together. The motive behind his work was to achieve a better position in the hierarchy and better pay. Is it illegal? After all, the purpose of every HR philosophy is to help the employees to identify their individual goals and aspirations with the goals of organization. If he performs better then organization as a whole benefits out of his productivity. If organization performs better he will benefit. Hence there is no difference between Self and Organization.

Some people indulge in corruption to make money. That defeats the purpose of organization. That kind of selfishness is not good.

Even when it comes to Sachin Tendulkar I sometimes noticed that when India needs to score at the rate of 7 runs per over to achieve the target in one days, when he approaches his Century, he slows down and that defeats the purpose of our game i.e., winning the match. Till 90s he score at the rate of 7 runs per over, and after he reaches 90s the run rate falls down to 3 to 4 runs per over increasing the burden on his fellow batsman and team. I don’t say, it happens very often, but it happens sometimes.

That kind of selfishness is also not good. He can be selfish when India bats first, and he can spend time to slow down to score his Century when India is at some 250/4 in 35th over. That kind of selfishness is OK.

I hope you will notice there are many kinds of selfishness, some are considered acceptable, some are consider anti-social or immoral, some are considered illegal and some are considered not acceptable.

Your fourth statement :

“Contentment equals laziness”

We should have contentment about what we have achieved, but not about what we are going to achieve.

Your fifth statement :

“Wisdom of Gurus is misleading and idiotic…”

I have already answered this in the opening lines….”that cat on the wall approach…”.

Your sixth statement :

“Kauravas are good, but….”

I did not say, Kauravas are good, I only said they are good team players. Even a gang of wolves is a good team when it hunts down a forest buffalow or a zebra, they show efficiency in their hunting skills. It is not necessary that only good people can become good team players.

Your seventh statement :

“It is foolish to seek contentment – better to seek unhappiness”

We should have contentment about what we have achieved, but not about what we are going to achieve.

“Unhappiness (sometimes) leads to excellence…”.

You got me right here. But you notice I have reserved the space for you to express your freedom of expression by using the word “sometimes” to agree with your view that unhappiness may also lead to depression and suicide.. I do agree that unhappiness sometimes leads to depression and suicides. In fact all creative people carry a wide range of thought processes. Their emotional intelligence leads them to depression sometimes when they are unhappy, because they have the ability to add one thought to another because their imaginative faculties work very strongly. Almost all creative people are very moody in nature. Their mood swings are unpredictable.

If they channelise their passions in a positive direction they are capable of achieving any heights, but if they channelize in a negative direction then there is every possibility that their thought process and imaginative faculties leads them to depression and irresistible impulse to commit suicide.

Regarding your final statement you will find my reply in opening lines:

In all great people unhappiness will be there. But they don’t allow it occupy their minds so much that it takes away their joy and peace of mind. Where it is necessary they will allow unhappiness to crop up and use that to improve their performance. I am not saying we should fill our organizations with unhappy, dissatisfied souls who always appear to us frustrated with their lives.

Thanks and regards for applying your mind on my ideas. God bless you.

Chandrasekhar

From India, Hyderabad
avalok
2

Hello and Good Morning Mr. Chandrashekar,
Appreciate you for sharing your thoughts. The defense is very good and very detailed. Kudos.
My response is in the form of a story/fable I wrote sometime back which is uploaded here.
Please go through when in relaxed mood.
Have a nice day!
Om Sai Ram!

From India, Bangalore
Attached Files (Download Requires Membership)
File Type: pdf crossing_the_river_127.pdf (32.4 KB, 70 views)
File Type: pdf crossing_the_river_127.pdf (32.4 KB, 47 views)

chandrasekhar_7203
3

:lol: :lol: I remember the old song of Mukesh reading your story.... "Sajan Re Jhoot Math Bolo....Khudaa Ke Paas Jaanaa Hai.... Na Haathi Hai...Na Ghodhaa Hi....Waha Paidal Hi Jaanaa Hai..."
From India, Hyderabad
pierson_david
2

Being happy is a state of mind. Taking out the word I and want to are easily said than done. Nevertheless history has numerous examples greed and wants taking people nowhere. This life is worth when as long as you live. In the absence of happiness comes a lot of worries, stress and eventually life threatening diseases. Set goals you can acheive and be satisfied with your efforts true happiness will follow.
pierson david

From India, Pune
chandrasekhar_7203
3

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Hi all & Avalok,

The discussion is over? Many people may be wondering what could be the relevance of this discussion to HR profession. This discussion is very much relevant to our profession because, this discussion tells us, "what motivates a human being".

If we are spiritual leaders we can give spiritual discourses to people who come to us with any discontment. But as HR professionals, it is irrelevant for us what "state of mind" a man should possess. What is relevant for us is whether happiness leads to better output or unhappiness. It is concern of spiritual leaders to suggest people to be happy if they have a frame of mind wherein they are suffering from misery for not achieving what they want in their lives, and for not enjoying their lives the way they want, not of HR professionals. We are only bothered "what motivates people" not "what their motives should be".

If he gets motivated by spirituality we get output from him, by motivating him on the path of spirituality. If he gets motivated by selfish desires, as long as what we suggest to them is not illegal and anti-social we motivate him to give his best to the organization by motivating him on the path of materialism.

That is how this discussion is relevant for HR professionals.

Why should we know what motivates people and be concerned about their motivations when we have power in our hands to get them do what we want them to do?

It is very easy for anyone to pass an order, "do as I say", because we have been vested with power and authority to get things done by our subordinates. But it takes great abilities to get the work from them with their "willful submission". When our subordinates follow our orders with "willful submission" rather than feeling it as a matter of compulsion to follow, then there will be better work atmosphere around us.

That is why we should be concerned about what motivates them.

Chandrasekhar

From India, Hyderabad
avalok
2

A revolving lithic conglomerate accumulates no congeries of minuscule verdant bryophyte. :D
The person presenting the finial cachinnation possesses thereby the primary cachinnation. :lol:
Missiles of ligneous or petrous consistency have the potential of fracturing my osseous structure, but appellations will remain sempiternally innocuous. :twisted: :P :lol: :D

From India, Bangalore
chandrasekhar_7203
3

:lol: :lol: Use easy words Dear! I am a logician not a litterateur. I will come back to you after referring dictionary..... Chandrasekhar
From India, Hyderabad
avalok
2

Thx Aditi, That is in case you are refering to my story and not Mr. Chandrashekar’s who I believe, of late, has been busy & highly motivated to hunt for and refer a good dictionary!! :D :lol:
From India, Bangalore
nev
It is not wrong to want or hope. It is the attachment to the want that is the trouble. One requires to be detached. Ofcourse it is not easy; but then all good things are not easy.
From India, Mumbai
avalok
2

"The Joy of Life"
This is the true joy of life.
The being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one. The being a force of nature instead of a feverish and selfish clod of ailments and grieving senses complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.
I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and that as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die. For the harder I work, the more I live.
I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got to hold up for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.
-George Bernard Shaw

From India, Bangalore
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