Hi All,
I am working as an HR executive in a company, I am the only lady in the organization. Everyday I am facing the same problem, as because my boss is shifted to other place, therefore he is unable to come to the office regularly.The other people of this branch(male) are not behaving with me properly. They always try to dominate. One is like that he doesn't like if I am talking with another person. Everyone forces their views on me, what to do & what not to do as because I am new. Sometimes it creates trouble because their views are different. I am really very confused what to do? I already complaint to my boss once for other reasons. He is very good, he understands me. But all the time, its like a......... Plz somebody help me out.
Regards,
Chandana
From India, Mumbai
1I am working as an HR executive in a company, I am the only lady in the organization. Everyday I am facing the same problem, as because my boss is shifted to other place, therefore he is unable to come to the office regularly.The other people of this branch(male) are not behaving with me properly. They always try to dominate. One is like that he doesn't like if I am talking with another person. Everyone forces their views on me, what to do & what not to do as because I am new. Sometimes it creates trouble because their views are different. I am really very confused what to do? I already complaint to my boss once for other reasons. He is very good, he understands me. But all the time, its like a......... Plz somebody help me out.
Regards,
Chandana
From India, Mumbai
Hi Chandana
First of all chandana as an HR person you have to become strong dont get dominated by other people because if you remain like this no matter in the current company but when you move to other company people will dominate you.It is everywere, because this is the human tendancy if anyone gets dominated people dominate him more. And about some guy you are talking about, clear him your expectations with a loud voice in front of others that you dont like him interferring him in your life and he is no one to tell you to whom you should talk and to whom should you not as you are not his private property and you can communicate to whom so ever you like when you do so that will be a lesson for others also. tell one person but let others undestand. Everytime keep one thing in mind dont let other people control you. Infact you try to control them. Dont think in such a way that a single person cant do anything but think what can a single person do if he decides...BE STRONG.
Regards
Kunal
From India, Mumbai
First of all chandana as an HR person you have to become strong dont get dominated by other people because if you remain like this no matter in the current company but when you move to other company people will dominate you.It is everywere, because this is the human tendancy if anyone gets dominated people dominate him more. And about some guy you are talking about, clear him your expectations with a loud voice in front of others that you dont like him interferring him in your life and he is no one to tell you to whom you should talk and to whom should you not as you are not his private property and you can communicate to whom so ever you like when you do so that will be a lesson for others also. tell one person but let others undestand. Everytime keep one thing in mind dont let other people control you. Infact you try to control them. Dont think in such a way that a single person cant do anything but think what can a single person do if he decides...BE STRONG.
Regards
Kunal
From India, Mumbai
Very well agree with Kunal ! A good response.. Yes, HR people do get pushed around but they must stand up on their own and be Strong! Regards, Rajat
From India, Pune
From India, Pune
Thanks Kunal & Rajat,
I agree with you but they don't give me a chance to perform.They never appreciate me whenever I am right, & comments on me whatever they like. It hurts me. Anyways thanks a ton, I SHOULD MYSELF.
Regards,
chandana:)
From India, Mumbai
I agree with you but they don't give me a chance to perform.They never appreciate me whenever I am right, & comments on me whatever they like. It hurts me. Anyways thanks a ton, I SHOULD MYSELF.
Regards,
chandana:)
From India, Mumbai
Chandana,
I don't think it is because you are a lady. In every organization, it happens. People do try to dominate the newly inducted employees. The best way, as per my view point is just try to adjust by making friendship with everybody. Firstly, everybody would avoid the same but gradually the situation would improve. There is no point in complaining to the boss everytime as the boss would get irritated.
Santosh Iyer
From India, Pune
I don't think it is because you are a lady. In every organization, it happens. People do try to dominate the newly inducted employees. The best way, as per my view point is just try to adjust by making friendship with everybody. Firstly, everybody would avoid the same but gradually the situation would improve. There is no point in complaining to the boss everytime as the boss would get irritated.
Santosh Iyer
From India, Pune
Dear Chandana,
Simple rules you can follow to come out from this problem.
(1) Do what you feel right, in this case you will enjoy your job
(2) Try to learn positive points from your co-staff, bosses and accept in front of them
(3) Forget your past experience from them.. remove all mindsets... Try to feel your presence and importance... forget what other thinks about you and for your role.. .. People accept as same as we think.. because our thinking become our behavior..
Try it and than give feedback
From India, Coimbatore
Simple rules you can follow to come out from this problem.
(1) Do what you feel right, in this case you will enjoy your job
(2) Try to learn positive points from your co-staff, bosses and accept in front of them
(3) Forget your past experience from them.. remove all mindsets... Try to feel your presence and importance... forget what other thinks about you and for your role.. .. People accept as same as we think.. because our thinking become our behavior..
Try it and than give feedback
From India, Coimbatore
Dear ChandanaDon't make others feel that being a lady you are not able to compete male and you feel insecure.You have to be bold enough to face this world independently and this will help you not only in the office but outside also.Time has changed and the female are doing better than male.Change your complex and do not give such excuses.YOGENDRA
From India, Kanpur
From India, Kanpur
The issues raised by Chandana are symptomatic of a larger phenomenon confronted by new recruits/inductees. There is a lesson to be taken by organisations also. This highlights the need for a formal induction progam which helps in the acculturation process.Otherwise the new recruit feels lost in an alien environment. The system of Mentoring which exists in some organistaions also helps the new inductee learn the ropes and to find a foothold. It is the role of the HR professionals to make use of these tools for betterment of organisations.
Ashok
From India, Bhubaneswar
Ashok
From India, Bhubaneswar
Dear chandana,
What I will suggest you to keep informing your boss every day by a simple mail, keep your boss in your hand if he is really cooperative, let him know and handle the situations and prepare yourself about the usual/normal behavior of Human Being.
Regards,
Chetan Prajapati
From India, Vadodara
What I will suggest you to keep informing your boss every day by a simple mail, keep your boss in your hand if he is really cooperative, let him know and handle the situations and prepare yourself about the usual/normal behavior of Human Being.
Regards,
Chetan Prajapati
From India, Vadodara
Hi,
The situation you are facing is common for new comers. Do not feel discouraged. You might be feeling obliged to listen to everyone considering their seniority and at times everybody's suggestions may sound good but practically difficult to implement.
First understand that each department has a deciding superior. Simple rule is to stick to your boss's instructions. You could smile and listen to all suggestions but make it clear to them by saying "I will discuss this with the boss and do the needful". You are likely to get reactions like "you cannot discuss everything with boss" etc but do not bother. You are responsible and answerable to your boss and he is the one who is going to appraise your performance. So all matters are to be put in place as per his instructions. Explain the situation to your boss and get his permission to call him on his mobile to seek his instructions in case of urgency. Since he is not being regular in attending office I don't think he would mind. Anytime you have difficulty in any matter call him immediately and solve the situation.
Secondly, HR department is always expected to be cordial to everybody. You should be an embodiment of tact and diplomacy. You should be friendly, non-offensive and at the same time make it clear to everyone that you know your rules of functioning and reporting. Thank people for their suggestions but do what is good for the office and approved by the boss. Over time the others will realize that they cannot influence you.
Thirdly, do not encourage anyone to waste your working time, even if it is an interfering senior colleague trying to advise you. You could respectfully tell them you will listen to them after finishing your urgent assignment. As a HR person you should set an example for a day's work turnover or productivity, without indulging in prolonged discussions. Hope you are getting my drift.
Lastly protecting your personal space and self respect is in your hands. If somebody behaves funny deal them as you would in your normal life. Somebody else in the office cannot come to your rescue in such cases unless you give a complaint. Hence nip these things in the bud.
You seem to be a patient and accommodative person. Just add the qualities of being clear about your role, confidence and talking frankly without being offensive. You would turn out to be a wonderful HR person!!!
Good luck!!:icon1:
Jyothi
The situation you are facing is common for new comers. Do not feel discouraged. You might be feeling obliged to listen to everyone considering their seniority and at times everybody's suggestions may sound good but practically difficult to implement.
First understand that each department has a deciding superior. Simple rule is to stick to your boss's instructions. You could smile and listen to all suggestions but make it clear to them by saying "I will discuss this with the boss and do the needful". You are likely to get reactions like "you cannot discuss everything with boss" etc but do not bother. You are responsible and answerable to your boss and he is the one who is going to appraise your performance. So all matters are to be put in place as per his instructions. Explain the situation to your boss and get his permission to call him on his mobile to seek his instructions in case of urgency. Since he is not being regular in attending office I don't think he would mind. Anytime you have difficulty in any matter call him immediately and solve the situation.
Secondly, HR department is always expected to be cordial to everybody. You should be an embodiment of tact and diplomacy. You should be friendly, non-offensive and at the same time make it clear to everyone that you know your rules of functioning and reporting. Thank people for their suggestions but do what is good for the office and approved by the boss. Over time the others will realize that they cannot influence you.
Thirdly, do not encourage anyone to waste your working time, even if it is an interfering senior colleague trying to advise you. You could respectfully tell them you will listen to them after finishing your urgent assignment. As a HR person you should set an example for a day's work turnover or productivity, without indulging in prolonged discussions. Hope you are getting my drift.
Lastly protecting your personal space and self respect is in your hands. If somebody behaves funny deal them as you would in your normal life. Somebody else in the office cannot come to your rescue in such cases unless you give a complaint. Hence nip these things in the bud.
You seem to be a patient and accommodative person. Just add the qualities of being clear about your role, confidence and talking frankly without being offensive. You would turn out to be a wonderful HR person!!!
Good luck!!:icon1:
Jyothi
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