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boss2966
1165

Never tell NO to any one. To be a successful HR Manager learn how to tell NO to anyone.
If we learn how to tell NO there our success elevator starts.
Without hurting your ex-boss's personal feelings and without tarnishing the respect for his post convey your NO to him politely.
Who knows, when, he will join you in your new organisation as your boss.
Explain him about your inability or feelings at his free time, when he can spare some time to listen your feelings.
With warm regards.
S. Bhaskar
9908732667

From India, Kumbakonam
santosh373
I really agree with tyagishrry its time to move on go ahead and do this for him as well as for you it can give you and him pleasure if you think that you don't want then just ask him that I am not interested so don't call me again and waste your time.
From India, Mumbai
sarib
Hi Kirishna, i m very sorry to say that at my point of view or one thing i persume that there is some reasons on your part which you did not qoute here that what are the reasons he just calling u to help whereas u had left his job very amizing. If as u mentioned here that due to your nature u cannot ask no to him then u may help him or otherwise u make courage to say No. Just no is the solution of the problems.
From Pakistan, Lahore
kcragesh
Dear Som,
I really liked your suggestions. As far as point 1 , "Never bad-mouth your previous boss - no matter how bad he/she really was" is a well said one, however same time we need not be artificially appreciate/ talk good about the boss also.
I think krishna got enough good tips from various people to decide his course of action.
Ragesh
OD Consultant & Trainer
Chennai

From India, Mumbai
ssmdev
hi pal
being too diplomatic has a problem, he would tend to see you as a weak person. at times it takes to put your foot down, the other way is to ignore his calls and i promise he would stop. Dont feel bad, its a small life and very soon all this would never even be a distant memory

From India, Thiruvananthapuram
SomGollakota
10

Hello KC,
"Do not bad mouth your ex-boss", or (more so) the current boss, does not mean "Say good things about your boss even if they are not true". If you do not have anything good to talk about someone, better to keep quite than bad-mouthing them (which reflects badly upon you than the person you are bad-mouthing). Further, if someone asks you about your ex-boss, as in many interviews ("Describe your previous boss"), and your previous boss was the winner of the "world's worst boss" award 10 times in a row, then the answer must be diplomatic. Here is an example:
Q: Describe your previous boss.
A: Working for my boss was a great learning experience for me. Every day I worked for him, I appreciated the opportunity to observe him up close and learn how to be a good boss.

(Why this is a true statement? How would you learn being a good boss from the worst boss? Just take everything he does, and flip it over. You learn from the worst professionals, not how to be, but how not be. Makes sense?)

Therefore, it is the perception of the individual who is answering the question and how the answer is framed. One need not praise someone (s)he dislikes. Just don't bad mouth them.

Bottom line, if I am your hiring manager and you are bad-mouthing your previous manager (even if I know that your previous manager is not particularly a good manager), the first thing I will think is - "This guy may bad-mouth me and tarnish my reputation when he leaves my team".

Regards,
-Som G


From United States, Woodinville
SomGollakota
10

Of course, the answer I gave above to the "Describe your boss" question may inevitably give raise to another question - "Then why did you leave (are leaving) his team?". Make this answer personal to you rather than to the company or the manager you worked for.
A: I believe I outgrew my role there, and want to expand my horizons.
Or
A: The organization's goals for the future and my goals for my own future grew apart. So, I am seeking employment in an organization who's goals I can align my goals better with.
This answer may inevitably give raise to another question ("So, what are your goals for your future?"). With this question, you have successfully brought the focus of the interview back to "you" from "your previous boss or company", because the interview is really about you - not your previous boss or company..
Alright... this is a whole different topic (How to effectively handle interviews") ;-) So, I will stop right here... :-).
Regards,
-Som G

From United States, Woodinville
p ramachandran
63

ask him at the time of he is calling for help! No harm- since you are elegible, you are asking.
From India, Madras
sanjay61
I always go for informative interactions because 'Knowledge Grows When Shared'. But when you feel his act as harassment then 'polite refusal' is the only answer. OR to extract your outstanding amount, you may co-operate till that limit. This is purely your choice.
Just think that the World is very small village these days and all your ex are your well-wisher & friends. Have you heard of 'pre-employment verification from all previous employers and Educational Institutions' ? Answer to your problem is hidden here also.

From India, Pune
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