Why are so unduly concerned about something which is a very personal matter. So long as the their adventure is not affecting their work performance and so long as they are not doing something unacceptable or obscene at the work place, why bother.
Moreover have you received any complaints from either party?
Let the two be. Let them mind their own business.
If at all you wish to take disciplinary action against the concerned duo, what evidence do you have to prove their misdemeanour?
Please do not jump the gun and let people be, if all is well, otherwise.
Will you take action against someone who, despite having a wife waiting at home, preferes to eat out with friends?
Suggestions of writing letters to the family etc...are ridiculuos. Please refrain from such avoidable "adventures".
Vasant Nair
From India, Mumbai
Moreover have you received any complaints from either party?
Let the two be. Let them mind their own business.
If at all you wish to take disciplinary action against the concerned duo, what evidence do you have to prove their misdemeanour?
Please do not jump the gun and let people be, if all is well, otherwise.
Will you take action against someone who, despite having a wife waiting at home, preferes to eat out with friends?
Suggestions of writing letters to the family etc...are ridiculuos. Please refrain from such avoidable "adventures".
Vasant Nair
From India, Mumbai
Hi Friends,
I think here HR role must play an imp and positive towards organisation. If they forget ethics, collegues, superiors then its right time to interfere and discuss with them. But strict proof like written complaint from other colleagues and many more like such is compulsory to discuss further. If you dont have any such clues with proof then better be calm, even if you think you need to discuss without proof you will be under pressure. Management will not co-operate you. And here management may not aware of seriousness of such acts or impact of such acts in their business trend. We need to discuss and project the seriousness and future consequences too. then they may also start thinking.
I also appreciate the advice given by our friends, every advice has its importance please follow every point. Reason being its an delicate issue.
Thanks
Kalasarvam
From India, Secunderabad
I think here HR role must play an imp and positive towards organisation. If they forget ethics, collegues, superiors then its right time to interfere and discuss with them. But strict proof like written complaint from other colleagues and many more like such is compulsory to discuss further. If you dont have any such clues with proof then better be calm, even if you think you need to discuss without proof you will be under pressure. Management will not co-operate you. And here management may not aware of seriousness of such acts or impact of such acts in their business trend. We need to discuss and project the seriousness and future consequences too. then they may also start thinking.
I also appreciate the advice given by our friends, every advice has its importance please follow every point. Reason being its an delicate issue.
Thanks
Kalasarvam
From India, Secunderabad
Please ascertain the facts of the 'affair' prior to making assumptions that this is indeed happening.
Office gossip tends to blow friendship into affairs causing pain and emotional damage.
If there is an affair and it is effecting the work of the 2 persons concerned then by all means speak to the two parties separately and in confidence.
It would also be a good idea to speak to the primary rumour monger/gossip spreader . This is not the sort of behaviour a company would countenance.
Regarding speaking to the husband & children about the lady is grossly immoral and unethical and I am appalled that such an action is even suggested.
It is equally shocking that so far the comments suggest that the lady in question should be penalised and not the other party in this so called affair!
From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
Office gossip tends to blow friendship into affairs causing pain and emotional damage.
If there is an affair and it is effecting the work of the 2 persons concerned then by all means speak to the two parties separately and in confidence.
It would also be a good idea to speak to the primary rumour monger/gossip spreader . This is not the sort of behaviour a company would countenance.
Regarding speaking to the husband & children about the lady is grossly immoral and unethical and I am appalled that such an action is even suggested.
It is equally shocking that so far the comments suggest that the lady in question should be penalised and not the other party in this so called affair!
From United Arab Emirates, Dubai
One should be professional in these things. We should not try or attempt to peep in other person's personal life, although these possibly might be very catching to few people and a hot matter of gossip in leisure time.
If you can do - play a role to divert people's focus on this thing. This is domain where person has got freedom to decide be it right or wrong / Good or bad. We or any body else morally also do not have any right to intervene in this domain.
If you can do - play a role to divert people's focus on this thing. This is domain where person has got freedom to decide be it right or wrong / Good or bad. We or any body else morally also do not have any right to intervene in this domain.
hiya
first do you have concrete evidence against her?
has she behaved in an in appropriate way in office?
Has she shown undue favoritism towards her lover so much so that it jeopradizes the team??
if the answer is no to the above then, it sis the rest of the team that needs counselling!
1. they have no work to do
2. they are wasting their time on grapevines and building negativity.
So pls take a careful call, and pls do not let feelings, individual beliefs or any such thing come in way of your decision. See if she serves the organization in better interest, in all probability she is
good luck
S.S.M Dev
Principal Consultant
BECORTA
From India, Thiruvananthapuram
first do you have concrete evidence against her?
has she behaved in an in appropriate way in office?
Has she shown undue favoritism towards her lover so much so that it jeopradizes the team??
if the answer is no to the above then, it sis the rest of the team that needs counselling!
1. they have no work to do
2. they are wasting their time on grapevines and building negativity.
So pls take a careful call, and pls do not let feelings, individual beliefs or any such thing come in way of your decision. See if she serves the organization in better interest, in all probability she is
good luck
S.S.M Dev
Principal Consultant
BECORTA
From India, Thiruvananthapuram
This type of problem is too common, I think it is not a serious problem for management.Management should talked with that lady.Most of women are immotional in nature. she can be involve such type of relation. May be she also want to end of this relation. At this moment she need a good friend or guide. Management can play this role.
Anindita
From India, New Delhi
Anindita
From India, New Delhi
Hi Sari,
I noticed everywhere we are talking abt that lady bt nowhere the man comes in picture neither his personal nor professional life wld be affected...May be he is not married bt still he is also in the same boat if management is concerned abt offc envt. only. Might be the case that this guy is responsible or in fact these are all overcooked stories
I would suggest to avoid the grapewine that might have evolved due to her being a smart and efficient worker. May be her team is full of her rivals...
there are n no. of possibilities and one can not conclude to the extent to rip off her professional and personal life.
best regards,
R A
From India, New Delhi
I noticed everywhere we are talking abt that lady bt nowhere the man comes in picture neither his personal nor professional life wld be affected...May be he is not married bt still he is also in the same boat if management is concerned abt offc envt. only. Might be the case that this guy is responsible or in fact these are all overcooked stories
I would suggest to avoid the grapewine that might have evolved due to her being a smart and efficient worker. May be her team is full of her rivals...
there are n no. of possibilities and one can not conclude to the extent to rip off her professional and personal life.
best regards,
R A
From India, New Delhi
Hello Dear,
See she is looking for a extra relationship means something is going wrong at her personal life. She is finding someone where she can express herself and that's exactly has happened. And its pretty natural.
Right now what we can do is consult to the guy and ask about her personal life. Now lets target her mental health. Support her, boost her confidence and slowly take her away from present relationship. I agree to what Ashwini Shah said, though it doesn't come in HR activities, we can help our employees to come out of such personal crisis. And I guess that will be real challenge for an HR to break the boundaries and manage the basic functionality as why HR? Is to take care of human. Professionalism and other aspects are true but from my point of view they comes later. Employee is like a kid for an HR. So rest all solutions.. you know it better
Regards
Sandip Waghole
From India, Pune
See she is looking for a extra relationship means something is going wrong at her personal life. She is finding someone where she can express herself and that's exactly has happened. And its pretty natural.
Right now what we can do is consult to the guy and ask about her personal life. Now lets target her mental health. Support her, boost her confidence and slowly take her away from present relationship. I agree to what Ashwini Shah said, though it doesn't come in HR activities, we can help our employees to come out of such personal crisis. And I guess that will be real challenge for an HR to break the boundaries and manage the basic functionality as why HR? Is to take care of human. Professionalism and other aspects are true but from my point of view they comes later. Employee is like a kid for an HR. So rest all solutions.. you know it better
Regards
Sandip Waghole
From India, Pune
From ayyar Natarajan
These are intrernal affairs of any person involving his personal matter. Management must concentrate with ytheir own company work only. It is not possible neither it is good to look into the personal matters of any individual working in the company as long as it does not affect his or her work or performance in the company.
Unless one person realises himself or herself what she / he is doing is wrong and if he/she does not distinguish from right or wrong no external force or advice or suggestion will not help any one. On the contrary it will only drive them more vigorously and the will become a rebel in the society.
Time is changing and the society also changing. The same type of information was brought to my notice regarding one my senior officer . I suggested that whatever be his wishes he should not neglect his own family because of his new venture. Surprising thing the was officer was an intelligent person embedded with honesty and integrity.
From India, Pondicherry
These are intrernal affairs of any person involving his personal matter. Management must concentrate with ytheir own company work only. It is not possible neither it is good to look into the personal matters of any individual working in the company as long as it does not affect his or her work or performance in the company.
Unless one person realises himself or herself what she / he is doing is wrong and if he/she does not distinguish from right or wrong no external force or advice or suggestion will not help any one. On the contrary it will only drive them more vigorously and the will become a rebel in the society.
Time is changing and the society also changing. The same type of information was brought to my notice regarding one my senior officer . I suggested that whatever be his wishes he should not neglect his own family because of his new venture. Surprising thing the was officer was an intelligent person embedded with honesty and integrity.
From India, Pondicherry
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