If a young women is divorced, and she has total of 3 years gap (not continuously) in her career as first she moved to her husband's city after marriage, she took one year to adjust in husband's family and then again joined another job after marriage but has to leave that job too after a year as she was going through bad marriage phase followed by divorce for 2 years.
Now she wants to find job again. But difficulty is that in most jobs marital status is asked. She can tell she is unmarried but then employers don't prefer unmarried women in late 20s or early 30s as they assume that if she will get married then she may leave the job, as in India most girls often do that and for once if she says she is unmarried, then ain't employer will ask about justification of 3 years of gap in career? Can she tell that she is married and till now her husband had posting a job in different city so she couldn't work. But if the employer bychance learn that she is divorced, then can it be integrity issue. I mean is hiding real marital status & stating wrong from employer integrity issue.
Please advice what should she do?
From India, Ahmadabad
6Now she wants to find job again. But difficulty is that in most jobs marital status is asked. She can tell she is unmarried but then employers don't prefer unmarried women in late 20s or early 30s as they assume that if she will get married then she may leave the job, as in India most girls often do that and for once if she says she is unmarried, then ain't employer will ask about justification of 3 years of gap in career? Can she tell that she is married and till now her husband had posting a job in different city so she couldn't work. But if the employer bychance learn that she is divorced, then can it be integrity issue. I mean is hiding real marital status & stating wrong from employer integrity issue.
Please advice what should she do?
From India, Ahmadabad
Hello rinsys,
I presume this situation refers to you--rather than someone else.
You have 2 options at the resume stage itself.
1] Just delete the 'Marital status' field in the resume which you send to prospective employers. Be silent on this aspect.
2] Include the field, but mention 'single' rather than 'married' or 'unmarried'.
Once you reach the stage of interview [F2F or Telecon] with any company, you can give the REAL input ONLY IF ASKED about this aspect.
Coming to the possibility of the employer insisting later [while finalizing the Offer or after Joining] about your marital status, you can mention the actual reason.
Recently, we had one candidate who is currently in USA & looking to relocate to India--she handled this part admirably well by saying that her marital status will not come in the way of her relocating to India[when we asked her about her husband & if he will also relocate]. Even now, we aren't clear if she is divorced--and we or our client isn't bothered, since he wouldn't be a part of her decision or the actual relocation. Hope you get the point.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
I presume this situation refers to you--rather than someone else.
You have 2 options at the resume stage itself.
1] Just delete the 'Marital status' field in the resume which you send to prospective employers. Be silent on this aspect.
2] Include the field, but mention 'single' rather than 'married' or 'unmarried'.
Once you reach the stage of interview [F2F or Telecon] with any company, you can give the REAL input ONLY IF ASKED about this aspect.
Coming to the possibility of the employer insisting later [while finalizing the Offer or after Joining] about your marital status, you can mention the actual reason.
Recently, we had one candidate who is currently in USA & looking to relocate to India--she handled this part admirably well by saying that her marital status will not come in the way of her relocating to India[when we asked her about her husband & if he will also relocate]. Even now, we aren't clear if she is divorced--and we or our client isn't bothered, since he wouldn't be a part of her decision or the actual relocation. Hope you get the point.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
The advise given by TS would not work:
Lots of companies do also include the status in a online form wherein you have to only tick the choice, divorcee could also be a choice given by the employer and in india divorcee still is a bad thing in the eyes of many people. So you have to handle it very carefully.
From India, Madras
Lots of companies do also include the status in a online form wherein you have to only tick the choice, divorcee could also be a choice given by the employer and in india divorcee still is a bad thing in the eyes of many people. So you have to handle it very carefully.
From India, Madras
I think Ravi has a point--when it comes to Online Forms.
You may not have a problem if the wording used is: 'single' instead of unmarried.
In situations where the options of 'Divorcee' or 'Single' aren't there in the online Forms, one way to handle could be to call the HR & put the problem across to them. If you are told that Divorcees aren't welcome, just let that opening go--better now than later in the whole Selection process.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
You may not have a problem if the wording used is: 'single' instead of unmarried.
In situations where the options of 'Divorcee' or 'Single' aren't there in the online Forms, one way to handle could be to call the HR & put the problem across to them. If you are told that Divorcees aren't welcome, just let that opening go--better now than later in the whole Selection process.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
I think you should be honest and put divorcee as a your marital status. Organisations who discriminate based on marital status are not worth working for anyway. I do not think being divorced is a taboo any longer in our country and people who think it is belong to the Jurrasic age, best avoided.
From India, Calcutta
From India, Calcutta
Thank you everyone for your replies
@Tejasteesh - you presumed right, its me. I can avoid mentioning my marital status as you suggested in your options, but what justification I give for gap in my career then.
@All
I am not able to think of any good reason which I can state for 3 years gap, don't understand what excuse I make for that. I recently attended couple of interviews, the interviewer asked me why wasn't I working since last 2 years and what was I doing between last 2 previous jobs, I have to tell them that I got married and moved to husband's city, then after one year found new job but it was very hectic doing up-down to this city so I left that job and started giving tutions. But now I moved to this city so want to start working again. Now when I give the reason of marriage, this says it all. Then they want to know what my husband is doing? Here where problem arise. I can well avoid telling marital status, but it automatically get revealed when I have to explain the career gap. Then I have only 2 options, either tell them that I am married, or to tell them I am divorced.
The real problem is not being divorcee, but the gap in career. I have a doubt that employer might judge me that even though I was going through divorce still why I have to not work for 2 years. I don't know what they can view on this, but only I know I had genuine reasons for not to work, not because I wasn't serious about my career. But how to present it to employer. I am sharing some of personal information here to get advice, but I don't find it appropriate to tell anything to employer.
From India, Ahmadabad
@Tejasteesh - you presumed right, its me. I can avoid mentioning my marital status as you suggested in your options, but what justification I give for gap in my career then.
@All
I am not able to think of any good reason which I can state for 3 years gap, don't understand what excuse I make for that. I recently attended couple of interviews, the interviewer asked me why wasn't I working since last 2 years and what was I doing between last 2 previous jobs, I have to tell them that I got married and moved to husband's city, then after one year found new job but it was very hectic doing up-down to this city so I left that job and started giving tutions. But now I moved to this city so want to start working again. Now when I give the reason of marriage, this says it all. Then they want to know what my husband is doing? Here where problem arise. I can well avoid telling marital status, but it automatically get revealed when I have to explain the career gap. Then I have only 2 options, either tell them that I am married, or to tell them I am divorced.
The real problem is not being divorcee, but the gap in career. I have a doubt that employer might judge me that even though I was going through divorce still why I have to not work for 2 years. I don't know what they can view on this, but only I know I had genuine reasons for not to work, not because I wasn't serious about my career. But how to present it to employer. I am sharing some of personal information here to get advice, but I don't find it appropriate to tell anything to employer.
From India, Ahmadabad
Hello rinsys,
The answer to your query--how to handle the career gap--is quite simple.
And especially since the gap IS NOT continuous.
You can say that you had personal issues to be resolved @ home/family where your focus & presence was a MUST & you didn't want to do any injustice to a job. Now that things are settled on the home/family front, you want to get back in the career. This way, you are neither lying nor giving away your personal reasons to whosoever asks. Once your comfort level is OK with the person(s) concerned, you tell him/her the details.
Most companies accept this reason--since it's to do with 'personal' issues & you are also conveying indirectly that whatever you do, you try to keep your focus on the right track.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
The answer to your query--how to handle the career gap--is quite simple.
And especially since the gap IS NOT continuous.
You can say that you had personal issues to be resolved @ home/family where your focus & presence was a MUST & you didn't want to do any injustice to a job. Now that things are settled on the home/family front, you want to get back in the career. This way, you are neither lying nor giving away your personal reasons to whosoever asks. Once your comfort level is OK with the person(s) concerned, you tell him/her the details.
Most companies accept this reason--since it's to do with 'personal' issues & you are also conveying indirectly that whatever you do, you try to keep your focus on the right track.
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
Thank you rinsys & Indira.
After all this is what CiteHR is meant for--right?
And coming to Indira's usage of the word 'complex' for such issues, it all depends on how one looks @ them [that's not to undermine the seriousness/gravity & the emotional turmoil such situations bring-about--it's just that I try to differentiate/discriminate between the trauma & the solution(s)].
But the problem comes when such suggestion/advice is misused/misdirected :-)
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
After all this is what CiteHR is meant for--right?
And coming to Indira's usage of the word 'complex' for such issues, it all depends on how one looks @ them [that's not to undermine the seriousness/gravity & the emotional turmoil such situations bring-about--it's just that I try to differentiate/discriminate between the trauma & the solution(s)].
But the problem comes when such suggestion/advice is misused/misdirected :-)
All the Best.
Rgds,
TS
From India, Hyderabad
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